Peace

I am giving a speech about peace today. Next fall, I am going to spend a semester studying peace and conflict resolution. Hmmm interesting....   (;

English Shenanigans Round 2

Well, I have received the official news...I am heading back to the UK! For my cross cultural her at Bluffton University, I am going to be going with a group of students to Northern Ireland for the semester next fall, 2013. I wasn't sure whether or not I would get accepted, so hearing the news was definitely exciting!

When thinking about next fall I am filled with all sorts of emotions:

I feel blessed to have this opportunity to travel abroad again.
I eagerly look forward to everything I will learn and experience.
I am excited to get to know my other team members.
It feels weird that I will be with different people, in a completely different setting.
It will be weird being at a University setting, and living with host families, instead of a work setting, living in my own home.
It will be weird not being with Britt and Rachel, among our 'family' in Bradford.
I hope to visit my Bradford family at the end of my time there, which gives me all sorts of happiness.
It seems strange that I only just returned, and now I will be starting the process of preparing for another journey.
I am anxious about leaving new friends made here at Bluffton.
I'm glad that I already have some experience, so I will not feel so much homesickness.
I'm excited to celebrate fun holidays like the 5th of November again.
I'm excited to drink good, British tea again.
I am excited to absolutely fill myself to the brim with fish and chips, among other yummy meals.


So, with all these emotions, my head is still in a bit of a whirlwind. (:

But overall, I am simply happy.

And, as you can tell.. I plan on continuing my blog during my time leading up to, and during my time there..

So ready, steady, go!...... English Shenanigans - Round 2

Blessings
xx

Art Tatum

I'm just going to come right out and say it.  I'm not in the mood to blog.  I haven't been for a few weeks now.  I've tried to think of things to write about, even wrote one out, but decided it was rubbish, so, obviously, I left it unposted.  << and that is something I've never ever done! (gasp).  But this is something that can't be avoided, and it is something that needs to be faced, so here-goes...but with a wee bit of a twist.

When we first got here, one of the fellas at the Anglican church asked if any of us lived close to Toledo, Ohio...(gasp) YES! I did!  (Britt too).  He went on to tell us of a famous jazz player, Art Tatum, who was from Toledo.  I probably thought something along the lines of, "right, okay, that's pretty interesting!"  And over the course of the year he continued mentioning Art.  And each time I got a little more interested in who this Art Tatum was.  I have no idea on who he was, or what his story is, but the other day I looked him up on YouTube.  And I rather enjoyed his music!  It isn't anything out of the ordinary, but I think what really draws me is that one of the darling British gentlemen suggested him.

So what I'm getting at is that this is one of the many memories I will be bringing home with me.  I probably won't always remember the name of the chap who first told me about Art, but I will always remember that he was the 'Art Tatum' guy....Just like I will remember so many other things, big or small, that remind me of my year spent here.

So here's to you Art!  And the lovely person who I will always remember, along with all the others who have become, not just friends, but family to me.

Art Tatum, Tea for Two

Twins

It's my BIRTHDAYYYY!!!  But more importantly, it is the day that I share with my beloved twin sister.  She has been there since day one.  My other half.  So today, I dedicate this blog post to the best twin sister this 20 year old could ask for.  I may not always be the most cheerful, or the nicest, or the most agreeable, or the most fun to be around, but you are always there for me, and I am forever going to love you.

Many times in the past we've been asked what it's like to be a twin.  I really have never had a good response to that.  How do you answer that?  It's like me asking, what is it like to not be a twin?  In a way it is almost like asking, what is it like to not have my right arm?  I don't know.  I've never been without my right arm, nor have I ever been without my twin sister.  I may not say it or show it enough, but she is irreplaceable, my life would lose half of it's meaning without her.

So a quick shout-out to you Elise, for always  being there for me, and being the best 'big' twin sister.

All my love.

End of Summer Blues

Alright, I've got another metaphor for you.  Unfortunately, it isn't as gory as my scabs metaphor (I'm sure you are all experiencing similar feelings).  However, I'm sure it will instill the same quirky bittersweet feelings, as it does me. (:

Also, before I dive right in, let me just add how I've been meaning to write this post for a week or so, but due to a week of glorious weather (70's and sunny!!!) as well as my new-found obsession with a series called Once Upon a Time, this post has been postponed. << My apologies for the obnoxious run-on!

Oooookay! Now for the good stuff!  You remember how when you were a kid, or maybe are/were a parent with children, and you would get the end of summer blues?  I'm not sure if this is the 'official' label for it, but it's what I am deeming it!  But you all know what I'm talking about.. Getting so excited for summer to be over, because you are starting to get bored (gasp. I know!).  But at the same time, you are thinking... 'This is crazy! Why am I excited for summer to be over, when I know I'll be ready for it again in three weeks?!'  Maybe it was the fresh, new school supplies, or getting to see friends again, or having a purpose in life besides playing outside..or, more likely, all of the above!  Whatever it was, there was always that growing anticipation for summer to end.

Well...I've got my own case of the 'Summer Blues' here.  I can tell the end of my time here is slowly RAPIDLY, way-too-quickly, approaching.  It's not that I'm ready to go, but I'm also counting down the days until I go home. It's like my head is saying, 'No, I'm not ready,' but my heart is saying, 'yes, it's time.'

It kills me to say that I'm ready to go home though, because the day I set foot on Bradford soil/pavement/whatever, a little piece of my heart became a part of Bradford.  No... I take that back, a piece of my heart didn't break off..  A new piece was added.  The love I've developed during my time here has become a part of my heart, a part of me.  Instead of leaving a piece of me behind, my heart just grows bigger.  Obviously this is rather bittersweet, because on 9 July, I will be taking all of this developed love with me, while leaving the source of it behind.  I can't tell whether I'm more sad or excited to leave.  Every day, minute, second, it changes.  I guess simply because Bradford has become home.  So I'm not just going home when I go back to America, but I'm also leaving home.  And this time when I leave home, I don't get to simply come back in 10 months. And quite honestly, that breaks my heart, and kinda freaks me out...

Nonetheless, the end of my 'summer' is drawing nearer.  My heart is looking towards the new adventures that are swiftly approaching.  I pray that these feelings are just temporary though.  Because I want to embrace my remaining time here.  After all, this is just one small, itty-bitty part of this crazy gift called life.  So I plan on enjoying every last bit of it!

....(insert: Side Note) >> And in embracing my remaining time, it seems as though I've become open to the idea of going in to school extra days!  I never ever thought I would find myself doing that!  But either in sensing my rapidly approaching end, or because of it being a fun-filled special events week at school, I found myself volunteering to help my teacher on Thursday and Friday in addition to our normal Mon-Wed schedule.  I must be coming down with something...but I'm kinda' looking forward to it!..(maybe..yes!)

Picking off Scabs

So... I've come to the decision that certain visitors should not be allowed to come.  These visitors shall remain anonymous, but they know who they are, (and a lot of you know who they are) and they will be appearing in some following pictures. (;

These visitors came in all their beauty and happiness, and you know what?  We had a fantastic time!  We laughed, we cried, we played, we talked.  I got to show them a smallish piece of my life.  We ate out at Prashad (a famous curry house)  I also got to take them to London and show them the sights like the pro-London traveler I've come to be.  We saw it all!  Big Ben, Westminster Abbey, House of Parliament, London Eye, Buckingham Palace, Piccadilly Circus, Tower Bridge, the Tower of London, the British Museum, Trafalgar Square, and even perused the National Gallery for a little bit!

Now,  don't be tricked.  I know this all seems lovely and happy, and fun...but take heed...it gets worse.

You know when you were little and you would pick off those pesky scabs before they were ready?  Maybe I'm the only one who's ever done this, but I'm going to compare this visit as a scab...being picked off before it was completely  ready.

My fall.. resulting in the booboo (hence the scab) was saying goodbye in Dulles Airport that August day, so many months ago.  Sure it hurt, but I had distractions from the pain..new journeys awaiting, so I hopped up and eagerly went on in my adventure.  My booboo healed, the pain went away, and I went on with life.  But remember, I still had that scab.. I started picking it off the moment I looked towards platform 2 at Bradford Interchange and saw them walking towards me.  That first hug, the countless hugs and kisses following, the hours spent together, the looks we shared across the living room, the cuddles on the couch, the late-night goodnight hugs, the hand-holding, the walking arm-in-arm, the hugs shared in H&M, the tears held back, the whispers murmured, the single tear in the museum while sitting together waiting for someone to come out of the bathroom, the giggles, the shared hotel room... all the little edge bits of my scab.. coming off little by little.  I was enjoying myself immensely.  But then, the big one, that one piece of the scab you KNOW you should leave alone because its definitely not ready to come off.  But unfortunately, I had no choice, I picked it off.  I gave one last hug each, and sent them on their way back to America, while I wandered back up the stairs to our hotel room.

And my scab bled.. not right away though.  I didn't realize it was bleeding until I got back home to Bradford.  I walked in the house, and it just felt...weird.  You see, my scab wasn't ready to come off.  I was ready to see them again, but I was NOT ready to say goodbye.  I didn't have the distractions this time around.. just my day-to-day life.  It felt weird that they were going home, and I was here for however many months left.  And now I had those hugs, those kisses, those looks shared, the walking arm-in-arm, fresh in my memory, only to be taken away again.  And it hurt.  It still does.  But I know my scab will heal again, and in time I will once again get to see them.

Now don't think I'm not happy that they came.  Maybe it would have hurt less if they didn't come, but I am infinitely happy that they did.  I had an incredible time with them.  I wouldn't trade it for the world.  I'm simply saying that this is what I feel post-scab picking.  No remorse, just thoughts.

Now...for the fun pictures!  :)

I LOVE YOU BOTH!!!

All my love.

On your marks, get set, GO! (again?)

By now, on the downward slope of this journey, you would expect our schedules to be routine by now, the faces familiar, expectations known. Basically, I should feel comfortable with day to day life.....WRONG.

I had become comfortable.  The faces were familiar. My schedule routine.  I knew what was expected of me.  Then, I got the exciting news that I was moving up to year 4 during afternoons until further notice.  Not a huge deal, except I was bummed that I had to miss topic work (which so happens to be chocolate right now..how cool!).  And then....today I was told that not only was I to be in year 4 all day now, but it is going to be until the end of the year.  To be honest, I'm a bit bummed that I have to just leave MY kids, that I had been with ALL year, and I wasn't likely to be working with them anymore!

It's kind-of like the saying, taking two steps forward, one step back.  I was finally starting to really enjoy myself in year 3!  But here I am, learning names all over again.  Learning a new routine.  Getting acquainted with new teachers.  Going through all the awkward stages of being a newbie..but on a smaller scale than 7 months ago. (:

Year 4 has so far been enjoyable though.  So don't think I'm just grumping around about this new situation.  I've decided to be open-minded and optimistic about it!  Already I'm beginning to really enjoy my year 4 students!  And!...My year 4 teacher gave me a gift today!  Because...did you know? ...today is World Book Night 2012!  If you are a book-lover like I am, and haven't heard of it, look it up!  I had never heard of it until today, and already I think it is WAY cool!  The books on the list are all pretty stellar too (from the ones I've read at least).

So yes, I had some bad news, but I'm still in good, happy spirits.  Maybe I'm just becoming a happier person.  Maybe it has a wee bit to do with the fact I have some visitors coming soon(;  Who knows?  Who cares?  Not I! (:


Also before I forget..It is someone's birthday this next week!  So as I close yet another blog post, I would like to send some love to my Grandpa.  Love you with alllll my heart!  Stay cheerful(;   And I miss you like crazy!  



All my love

Dear Grandma

Dear Grandma,

Today, I made your cake.  It wasn't nearly as scrumptious as yours, but it was a sweet reminder of all the times we have it at your house.  All the Christmases, Easters, Thanksgivings, Birthdays, and family get-togethers.  All the times rushing to get an inner piece.  All the love and laughter shared during those times together.  The cake just happens to be an accessory of course, it's the people who make these times the great memories they are.

But in short, it reminded me of you...and how much I love you!

Sending all my love, along with hugs and kisses, until I can hug you again, in real life!

Kaihle
        xx

Just Because

Trust Me, and don't be afraid.  Many things feel out of control.  Your routines are not running smoothly.  You tend to feel more secure when your life is predictable.  Let Me lead you to the rock that is higher than you and your circumstances.  Take refuge in the shelter of My wings, where you are absolutely secure.


When you are shaken out of your comfortable routines, grip My hand tightly and look for growth opportunities.  Instead of bemoaning the loss of your comfort, accept the challenge of something new.  I lead you on from glory to glory, making you fit for My kingdom.  Say yes to the ways I work in your life.  Trust Me, and don't be afraid.     - Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young


Today, I was the happy little camper who got a package!  It was a book of devotions from my step-mom.  I opened it up to today's date, and this was the reading, along with some scriptures.  I found it quite fitting to be the first one I read.  My routine this year isn't anything new or surprising, but looking back, there were definitely times at the beginning where it wasn't exactly 'smooth.' It also fits when looking to the upcoming transition us Radical Journey-ers have when going back home, readjusting, and either heading off to school a few short weeks later, or heading to a job, or whatever.  Kinda scary!  This was just a nice reminder of where we can ALWAYS find comfort when life throws us a curveball.... Also, I'd like to point out that I actually prefer when my life is a bit unpredictable, but that's besides the point. (:


All my love!

Miz' Independent

You will all be thoroughly happy to learn that over the course of this past year, I have become more independent!  ..Not that I wasn't already independent.  I like to be a big kid and do things by myself, who doesn't?!  But.  My newly found independence is a bit different.  This year, I have found myself...shopping by myself, getting coffee by myself, and, as of tonight, going to the movies by myself!

Usually, if I find myself the sole person wanting to go see a movie, I'll either beg and plead, or just wait for it to come out on dvd...orr watch it online(;  But!  This was TITANIC!  And seeing as I've already seen it a couple hundred or so times already, I absolutely had to see it!  -yes, I was that person who could not survive without seeing Titanic on the bigscreen, because I'm that much of a nerd/fan(:

So, is it that big of feat becoming a teensey bit more independent?  No, probably not.. but its a small something. And it's at least food for thought(:



PS - This is the 2nd day in a row I've posted a blog.. Do I get an award or something?



All my love!

Drumroll please!

Spring is finally here!...at least it was.  The other week we had beauuutiful weather, and we spent a lot of our afternoons outside on the trampoline.  Which was amazing!  But as of last night, we now have snow again, which is a bit of a bummer.

But anyways...wayyyy back in February, Darrell, our American director came to visit us!  The week he spent here was filled with talking, eating, and laughing.  He challenged us to take some time and think of what we want out of the rest of our time here, and in what ways we can become more involved in the community.  We were also able to talk to him about how things were going for us, in the workplace, community, home, etc.  He was able to provide an outsiders point of view, which was interesting to hear.  We were able to share some of our frustrations with him, and one of the ways he responded was that it's about the story you tell.  I took this and applied it to my work in the school.  I've always tried to be patient and appreciate my time in the school.  But since he's been here, I've tried to go in each and every day with a good, positive attitude.  I've been able to enjoy school a lot more since!  --Although, I would be lying if I said there weren't days when I still get beyond frustrated.

Darrell's visit also brought laughter.  We played countless hours of Rummey (sp?), as well as a good amount of Monopoly.  We took him to Prashads, he took us to London.  We cooked delicious food.  We joked back and forth, and had an all around good time together.  It was also nice just to see a familiar, American, face.


I have also recently made my college decision!  (insert sigh of relief)  My decision is.....GOSHEN!  I am really looking forward to starting my college experience here.  After making this decision final, I feel that it is definitely the right choice....for now(:  

Just a few other odds and ends...my hair is no longer blonde.  We are on a two week Easter holiday!  Next week we travel to Italy for our team retreat!  And in just over 3 weeks I will be reunited with two of my best friends!



It hardly seems possible that we have around 3 months left on this journey.  My feelings are constantly in battle between excitement - to be reunited with friends and family. to be home. to start school; fear - going back to reality after this dream; sadness - leaving my friends and family in England.  leaving this new home of mine.  But the journey isn't over yet, so I'll just wait to ponder those thoughts more until it's time.


All my love!

Freckles!

I've had this blog in the back of my mind for a few weeks now.  To be exact, it's been floating around since a bit before the 7th of February.  Why? you ask?  Because the 7th was our 'half-way' point.  -- Yes, we actually had it counted to the day.  Not that we were counting up, or down, we just wanted to know when it was.  However, after passing this day, a bigger change appears than meets the eye.  Before we were always counting up, "we've been here 1 month, 3 months, etc."  Now, the countdown begins - 5 months to go, 1 week until Darrell comes, 3 months until family visits, etc.

I've been finding myself looking towards the future a lot lately.  Both the imminent and further away futures.  Sometimes during the day, I find time creeping slowly by, but when looking at our diary (schedule) we are actually quite busy these next few months, and it seems almost as we hardly have enough time left!  I've also thought about what it will be like once returning home, and cannot even begin to comprehend what it is going to be like, feel like, or how I will react.  But I won't get into that quite yet(:

A quick update on life here, we had a decent day or two of snowfall around the same time as the halfway point!  We even had enough for a snowman!  (although it took all the snow from our backyard as well as our driveway and some of our neighbours snow).  We built it in our neighbors' yard, and I christened it Freckles because it picked up bits from the driveway and garden making it all spotty.  It was a good day(:   << Unfortunately, Freckles had a short life.  A little while after our neighbors found him, he fell over with only his bottom bit left standing.  We came home to find some of his 'remains' decorating our doorway.  Thanks to Barry!

 

 

 

):  Poor little guy!

On Monday our director, Darrell, from America is coming!  I think it is safe to say we are VERY excited for this visit!  Not only because he is great fun to be around, but also, he brings up very good points in conversation, as well as some thought-provoking questions.  And it will just be nice to see a familiar American face(:

A little more on where I'm at in life... Still haven't quite figured out the whole college thing... However!  I did receive news the other day that I won a Communications scholarship to Goshen!  This was a bit of a shock because I never expected to win it.  In addition, I had thought a few times that if I, by some miracle, got it, then that would be that, I would go to Goshen.  But I still haven't taken the plunge and said yes or no yet.  I can't quite figure out why I'm having such a hard time making a decision, even after getting the scholarship, but it IS getting closer!  In all honesty, I expect I'll be at Goshen, but I can't quite get myself to let go of CIA.

Anyways, back to England... In the upcoming days and weeks, I'm hoping to do some good reflecting, make some decisions, and maybe start volunteering!  I had applied to volunteer at the National Media Museum, but as it turns out, there's a waiting list to volunteer!  Crazy, huh?  So I might look into volunteering at the Treehouse Cafe, where Rachel is also volunteering.  From the few times I've been there it seems like a lot of fun!  And all around, I hope to take the time to appreciate every day I have left here.  Because, like it or not, the end is approaching WAY faster than I could ever imagine.

Thanks for those of you who've been thinking/praying for team England, RJ, and myself.  And especially for those of you who've taken the time to send an email, or give some college advice.  YOU GUYS ROCK!

All my love.

First Goodbye

Today, I said the first of my goodbyes.  One of my students is moving back to Indonesia with his family, and today would have been the last I got to see him.  -- On a quick side note, I didn't actually get to say goodbye since we had to go to a inter-faith session today last minute.  -- However, it was still goodbye.  It wouldn't have been a big deal if it hadn't been one of my favorites.  I know, I know, we shouldn't pick favorites, but really, who doesn't, in some way, sub-conciously have favorites?  And when I say favorite, I really enjoy ALL my kids, there's just a rather large handful who I especially like being around, including him.

So... Here's to the little boy, who, at first I thought was going to always get on my nerves, but ended up being a joy to work with.  Wishing him the best, and will miss him the rest of my year here and beyond.

On a trip to York with my kids

Back to the Future II

Spoiler Alert:
The following Blog is likely to be lengthy, me pouring my thoughts out, possibly a bit confusing due to rambling, and could be a bit hard to follow.  So, in advance, I give no hard feelings to anyone who skips around or skims through... enjoy(;

January, what a dreadful month it is.  Christmas is over, resolutions are being made and broken, everyone still feels a bit groggy from all of the Holiday eating, and one begins to think about the F-word (future). England is still lovely and enjoyable, just a little less than at the beginning and when there's good weather.  This time of year is quite honestly a bit depressing here.  It constantly rains and sleets with lots of wind, it's cold, and nighttime begins around 4.  This means that people tend to stay inside more, which means less fresh air, activity, and so on.  Obviously this leads to one feeling slightly morose or down and gloomy.  This, is me. Don't get me wrong, I am still quite enjoying myself, and am having lots of fun, but there are those times where I just feel kinda sad, or lazy.  I am definitely looking forward to the arrival of spring!  We had a quick glimpse of spring the last couple of days where it was beautiful, slightly warm, and SUNNY until about 3.30!  It was excellent and cheered our moods(:

Now, for the tough stuff...Back to the Future.  Lately I've been thinking more and more about next year and what that means for me.  Unfortunately, I find myself, yet again, clueless.  I was heavily leaning towards Goshen for a couple of months, but then my mom brought up a point which had me very excited for a couple days, and I applied to the Culinary Institute of America.  (quickly...for those of you who may not know, I am a lover of baking, and watching cake shows and decorating cakes, cupcakes, etc.).  So there's those two schools I have on my plate to pick from.  Unfortunately it's kind-of like choosing between chocolate brownie mixed with chocolate cake and a smooth delicious cheese cake.  Both so tempting, but which is the better choice?  Also, I seem to have kept some 'cookies' in the background just for some extra options... because really, it's not like the decision is hard enough already, right?  << If you didn't catch that, the 'cookies' are other colleges I'm interested in, but we don't need to dive into that.

So. Goshen and CIA.  Both have many pros and cons.

Goshen:  It's mennonite, it has a swell comm. program, it's mennonite, it's cute, a degree would have wiggle room career wise, it's small, it has the college feel, oh and it's mennonite.  However, I have no future drawn up in my mind from there (career, etc.), it's small, small town, and typical.

CIA:  It's the 'Harvard of Culinary school,'  it's interesting, it's different, it's in New York,  I would have a picture-able future from the start, I would spend my time decorating and being cutsie.  However, it's not mennonite, it's not your 'typical' college experience, and there's not much wiggle room if I graduate and decide I don't want to be a baker.

^  Those are just a quick picture of all that's running around my mind currently.  It may seem early to start freaking out about the future, but with FAFSA, and scholarships, and Registration forms, it seems like the perfect time.  All of this is quite familiar though, because last year I was in this same position, unable to decide, frustrated, confused, just different schools (kind-of).  However, the indecisiveness lasted until May where I had to hurry up and decide.  Hence, my joining Radical Journey (in-part).  Unfortunately, I only have 6 months left <crazy I know!>  and I doubt my parent's would be too thrilled if I took another year off to dapple in my confusion.  So it looks like it's about time to make some tough decisions, and I'll state the obvious and say I'm not looking forward to making those decisions yet.

I'm still waiting, waiting for that sign that says 'Do this,'  waiting for that ah'ha moment, waiting for the answer to slap me in the face, waiting for someone to tell me what to do, waiting to just know.  So as I wrap this 'cheerful' blog up, I would welcome any advice from the peanut gallery, no matter who you are.  No worries, I'll be here, thinking and praying away for the answer too.







P.s.  If you didn't catch it, the title, Back to the Future II, is related to my being here, undecided, same feelings, again, for the second time, twice, dos..........Genious. I know(; hehehe